words, words, words

Writing my last post was a struggle. I forced myself to sit down and write, but didn’t really have anything notable to write about. I struggle to recap all of the amazing things that happen in this lifetime, and do better writing about things less concrete. Maybe that’s why I never stuck with a diary growing up.

Written from the POV of 12 year old Erin – Dear Diary. Today was cold. That boy I’ve been obsessing over in 2nd period history looked my way. I got an A on that test I was worried about. Band was fun. Monica passed me the best note. I had gravy on my crinkle cut fries for lunch. The boy I’ve been obsessing over was holding hands with that annoying girl who wears all the name brand clothes… poor taste. Mom made spaghetti again. We watched Home Improvement. The end.

Yeah, not my speed. Creative inspiration strikes when I least expect it and more often than not, I’m not sitting in front of a keyboard when it happens. That makes writing the thing I want to write hard. Or rather, writing the things I want to put out in the world hard. Some of these posts get a handful of comments, some get none, most all seem to get a lot of interest when I post them over on Facebook for whatever reason… so there is that. I dive into the topic of “why does one blog these days” when I think about it. It’s more for me, to have something to read later to remind me, but clearly not remind me of things I did yesterday, but things I was thinking about yesterday, if that makes sense.

It does to me. I suppose that’s what matters.

Also, I’m not sure there is anything as hilarious as the blog I started in 2001. I’m amused those words and thoughts live out there to enjoy every now and then. I’m convinced I’m the only person who read it in the early 2000s, and am certain I’m the only person who reads it today.

Yesterday I took a deep dive into a song I’ve heard dozens of times, but never really landed on. I listened to it Tuesday evening and went on about my time before heading to bed without a second thought. Yesterday morning, while plugging away at a list of emails a mile long, it whispered in my ear… a secret reminder that it was out there. With each break I had between meetings, I’d go back to that song. I was haunted by it all day. Obsessed even.

It left me thinking.

What other lyrics are out there. Just lightly touching us initially, not overly obvious, but pushing a song so deep into our hearts that we can’t just forget about it after we go onto the next song. You wrap yourself in this lyric so tightly, that letting go isn’t as easy as exterminating an earworm.

Does that leave you breathless?

Just me?

Again, I suppose what it does to me is what matters. This is my story, after all.

I grasped this last night as I sat in my studio playing with beads and metal. Diving into the creative freedom the album series allowed me, I started to string lyrics together that weren’t the ones typically requested or thought of when working on a piece of jewelry. Like the album series, there is no expectation to create a best seller with this. I just used lyrics I loved, but never see used in any of the fan groups I follow. It was freeing and opens an entire world of places to go, ears to perk, and hearts to grab.

My hope is, with each of these new creations, that someone is reminded of a long forgotten lyric and it shakes them to their core as it did to me yesterday.

4 thoughts on “words, words, words

  1. I bet there are others that read your blog currently but don’t comment. Maybe they even read your old blog and get a kick out of it! Read is a weird word. It can be past-tense or present-tense. I think it’s cool that you have shared your stories and thoughts with the internet over the years. I bet there’s someone that read your blog back in the 2000’s, moved on, and then they hear a lyric to an old song and think to themselves “this reminds me of that one girl’s blog, I wonder what she’s up to now!” and maybe they’ll find your new one. Or maybe they forgot your name and just remember the color of your page and some humorous entry title. I think it’s cool to think that you may have touched the lives of many more people than you realize by just writing your thoughts and ideas on a webpage for two decades.

    Kind of crazy to think how much people change over that time, and you can go back and kind of get a peek into your past life whenever you want. I kind of wish I had done the same.

  2. Your comment has stuck with me for a few hours. Perhaps that’s one of the things that leads me back here time and time again. What if someone remembers I’m out here and comes in search of some update or reassurance that I’m still roaming this earth. A way to confirm that while things and people change, they really aren’t too far away. And now I’m curious, what lyric would lead someone back to a memory of me… or a memory of something I wrote so long ago (or not so long ago), or even the song that pushes someone to that flash of color that was the anchor for my first blog (purple… lots of purple). Now there’s a playlist I’d be curious to explore.

  3. I definitely think there’s comfort for some people to know you’re still out there roaming the earth. They might not think about you for months or years, but maybe they hear a song by DMB, or they see an old picture of you, or maybe of themselves, and they remember how you touched their life at that point in time. So they go on a search and find you again. Or maybe it’s not a picture or a song, but someone that used to know you and they make a trip back to that place and seeing some old buildings or a landscape, they get that same feeling. You never know what might make someone think of you, I’m sure you have those moments too where some random things transports you back years in the past.

    Nostalgia is a powerful thing.

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